Saturday, August 26, 2017

Modesty 4

The Apostle Paul taught us the gold standard of modesty when he declared that he magnified Christ in his body. Paul wanted to conduct himself in such a way that Christ was glorified by every action on his part. Such a desire demonstrates Paul’s modesty and teaches us the true meaning of the word. Modesty is not defined by how of our body is covered. It is defined by how much of Christ can be seen through us. Christ cannot be seen through some sort of self-abased and timid hiding of our personalities. Rather, it depends on how much we allow Christ to form our personalities in His image. Modesty demands our boldness to show Christ to others. So how does this translate to clothing and appearance? 


I would suggest that we should avoid marring our appearance permanently. The only marks on our body should be the marks of Christ. Liturgically these are the symbols of ordinances such as baptism and laying-on-of-hands. Spiritually these are the life manifestations that we are Christ’s.  Other physical marks, such as tattoos, piercing and extreme haircuts and depilation, are barriers to magnifying Christ. 

What about clothing? Thoughtful reflection on scripture and liturgy should reveal that there are two kinds of protection: 1) the vain apron of fig leaves, and 2) the effective God given coat of skins. Symbolically and literally we wear both. 

Endowed members wear the temple garment as an outward expression of an inner commitmentto be obedient. Here a word of warning is necessary: the inner commitment is even more important than the outward expression. One must have internalized one’s commitments to the point that one no longer relies on a physical shield and protection but is fully armed spiritually. Indeed, for the garment is removed from time to time. Swimming, bathing, strenuous athletics, and intimate relations with one’s spouse are justifications for removing it. It most likely would be removed during a hospitalization or a medical procedure, in some phases of military training and other Spirit directed times.

Is one thereby immodest? 

Not at all. Even completely naked we are not relieved of the obligation to magnify Christ in our bodies. We must recognize that we are all naked before God. We know that if we act in Christ’s example, our confidence will wax strong in the presence of God. Naked as he sees us, we will not be ashamed.

So, I am emboldened to suggest that it may be a useful spiritual discipline for individuals who need to remove their clothing, including the garment, for swimming and other activities to consider removing all their clothing for such activities under certain conditions. 

This surely cannot be done in places where it is illegal or where there is inadequate protection from evil intentions. But there are a number of facilities in the US where families can swim nude safely. They are family oriented nudist resorts that have reasonable protections in place to assure that members and guests can enjoy nude recreation safely. Isn’t this hedonistic? So one might ask but these facilities are determined to create a safe environment for children consequently sexual behavior is strictly forbidden. 

What one typically finds is older men and women of a huge variety of body shapes, mostly heavy. They are rarely comely in the manner of the world. Some few are certainly hedonists but they are forbidden any hedonistic excess in public at such resorts. Most are outgoing and friendly. Many are faithful church attenders. The experience is not risk free but it is no more risky than swimming at the YMCA or watching a movie in a darkened theater if that. 

One consequence of removing your clothing is that many of the cues that form one’s reaction to others disappear. One starts to see the humanity of others, not pretenses. A reflective person can learn how to magnify Christ to others through deportment, conversation and kindness. One almost immediately recognizes the lack of inherent connection between the nude body and sexual arousal. 

Occasional nude recreation becomes a spiritual discipline, an opportunity to reevaluate the body and its urges and a way to contemplate the magnifying of Christ without resorting to adornment and pretense.

Two cautions:

  1. One should choose resorts that acknowledge themselves as family friendly. Resorts that are adult only or advertise as lifestyle clubs are for swingers. In general I would recommend more active resorts as there is some small increase in safety in number.
  2. One should avoid scandal. You may assess what you do to be moral and within your covenants but another may not see it that way. Try not to offend. Discretion is always good. Making too much of this is immodest. It is like fasting. It is something we do without advertising.

Thursday, December 15, 2016

I Had No Idea

I came across a blog that deals with sexuality in the context of LDS belief and practice. It is actually a series of podcasts with an LDS sex therapist. What I have heard is useful. This episode deals with a question from an LDS man whose wife refuses him sex altogether. (Second question in the podcast).

Sunday, December 4, 2016

Men, Is Your Relationship Properly Balanced?

One of the challenges of having an urgent sexual need is that it puts your wife in a position of control. So in this feminist age what is wrong with that? Shouldn't she have some say so?

Saturday, August 13, 2016

Men, would you have intercourse without orgasm?

The typical motivation for sexual intimacy is the pleasure of an orgasm. This pleasure is experienced individually by the partners in the act. I contend that it is impossible for a man to feel his wife’s orgasm and likewise for a woman to feel her husband’s. Oh yes, either may feel some contractions and certainly will see some evidence of it in the face, posture, breathing, and vocalizations of his or her partner but neither feels the other’s pleasure. Neither experiences the endorphin rush or any of the bodily changes up to and include the release of tension that has been built up in the other's body. 

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Ejaculation

I am fully licensed for orgasm. I am faithfully, legally and heterosexually married and within the constraints of my wife’s consent, I am free to ejaculate at will with no guilt and no shame. What a privilege.  


Friday, July 8, 2016

Faith and the Body

The notion of God's existence is a proposition that cannot be proved directly by the senses. We cannot seek him with our eyes, our ears, our nose, our taste or our touch.  But yet we persist in the satisfaction of our senses with the vain expectation that sensuality and the discovery of God are unrelated or, even worse, that sensuality is a route to the discovery of God.

Can anyone find anything in the scriptures or prophetic record that suggests that the senses are the source of spiritual understanding? What does Romans 6:12-13,16,19 say? How about Jude 1:14-20? It is impossible to see God with the senses.

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Paying for a Cow When the Milk is Free

https://pjmedia.com/lifestyle/2014/3/29/the-best-kept-sexual-secret-on-a-hook-up-campus/?singlepage=true

Obviously my headline is sarcastic. I do not believe that women have sex just for sex's sake. Maybe partly but mostly I think women are looking for a relationship. Frankly there are very few men who can give a woman a thrill on their first encounter.

Guys, you need to get control of your "feel good now" demand and gals you need to look for commitment from someone who has control of his "feel good now" impulse.